Advice For Real Life
In another great line of Vice articles: THE VICE GUIDE TO EVERYTHING
Some gems:
DOs & DON'Ts—Fuck-frequency
In the first year of a relationship, you have to do it at least four times a week. Second year it goes down to three. From the third year to the fifth year, you have to do it at least twice a week. After that, it's once a week until you get married, then it's never (seriously).
DOs & DON'Ts—Scent
Don't wear cologne. A boy's natural scent is truly delicious. And even fresh BO is great. Sure, Drakkar Noir has an aphrodisiac in it, but we're not in seventh grade, and you don't need to hide the pot stench from your mom.
And this one that I hope everyone heeds, especially in the subway:
DOs & DON'Ts—The Golden Rule
Don't go in before the other person comes out. This applies to a restaurant, a building, a bus, anything. It is so universal that you should let it philosophically inform everything else you do for the rest of your life. Don't go in before the other person comes out.
In another great line of Vice articles: THE VICE GUIDE TO EVERYTHING
Some gems:
DOs & DON'Ts—Fuck-frequency
In the first year of a relationship, you have to do it at least four times a week. Second year it goes down to three. From the third year to the fifth year, you have to do it at least twice a week. After that, it's once a week until you get married, then it's never (seriously).
DOs & DON'Ts—Scent
Don't wear cologne. A boy's natural scent is truly delicious. And even fresh BO is great. Sure, Drakkar Noir has an aphrodisiac in it, but we're not in seventh grade, and you don't need to hide the pot stench from your mom.
And this one that I hope everyone heeds, especially in the subway:
DOs & DON'Ts—The Golden Rule
Don't go in before the other person comes out. This applies to a restaurant, a building, a bus, anything. It is so universal that you should let it philosophically inform everything else you do for the rest of your life. Don't go in before the other person comes out.
